Thursday, February 09, 2006
Playing Favorites
pHey Guidance Guy!
I kind of have a problem with one of my teachers. She is the cheerleader coach which causes her to play favorites with us in her class. She only likes the girls in my class who are her cheerleaders and the few boys who are football players. A few of my friends and I are in the same class and we all agree that she is playing favorites, so this isn't just my opinion. We even asked other kids who have her in other classes and they say the same.
At first I thought nothing of it, really. But then I starting getting in trouble for the things her cheerleaders were doing. For example, one time we had to all break up into groups and naturally the cheerleaders went together. Their group sat right in front of my group and were talking so loudly they disturbed everyone else. Instead of yelling at them or making them be quiet, my teacher yelled at my group instead. How is that fair? And a couple other things like this have happened. I was thinking about bringing it to the school's attention, but if I do that and they don't do anything about it, then I fear that my teacher will hate me more than she does and treat me even worse.
What should I do? Should I tell someone about it? Or just let it go and stick it out the rest of the school year?
Signed,
The Kid the Teachers Hate
*****
Dear Kid,
It's possible this teacher pays more attention to the cheerleaders and football players. She wouldn't be the first teacher to play favorites and she won't be the last. You have a few choices here. One is to talk with the teacher - in private and not during class time. Stick with the facts. Talk about how your group is being yelled for what others are doing. If you do this, be specific about who, what, when and where. Let her know how this makes you feel. Is it interfereing with your learning? Is it making you feel less important? Be clear.
Another choice is to talk with your guidance counselor about this. Same directions...stick to the facts and how it makes you feel.
And of course you can wait for the end of the school year, which is coming closer everyday. You can chalk it up to a learning experience and plan for a better experience next year.
But there are two things I'm noticing here. First, how does this make you feel? Many kids would find this annoying but not get too bent out of shape over it. Some would have really hurt feelings. Some might even find it funny. Before you decide what to do, figure out how you're really feeling about this situation.
Second, the way you signed your letter was very interesting. Are you really "The kid The Teachers Hate?" "Teachers" means there is more than one teacher you have a problem with.
It's possible to have a real conflict with one teacher where it's just a personality issue. But if you think the teachers really hate you, it's a good idea to look at your own behavior. What are YOU doing that makes teachers upset with you? Figure that one out before you go forward.
Good Luck,
The Guidance Guy
P.S. Teachers almost never hate kids, even the ones they get annoyed with.
I kind of have a problem with one of my teachers. She is the cheerleader coach which causes her to play favorites with us in her class. She only likes the girls in my class who are her cheerleaders and the few boys who are football players. A few of my friends and I are in the same class and we all agree that she is playing favorites, so this isn't just my opinion. We even asked other kids who have her in other classes and they say the same.
At first I thought nothing of it, really. But then I starting getting in trouble for the things her cheerleaders were doing. For example, one time we had to all break up into groups and naturally the cheerleaders went together. Their group sat right in front of my group and were talking so loudly they disturbed everyone else. Instead of yelling at them or making them be quiet, my teacher yelled at my group instead. How is that fair? And a couple other things like this have happened. I was thinking about bringing it to the school's attention, but if I do that and they don't do anything about it, then I fear that my teacher will hate me more than she does and treat me even worse.
What should I do? Should I tell someone about it? Or just let it go and stick it out the rest of the school year?
Signed,
The Kid the Teachers Hate
*****
Dear Kid,
It's possible this teacher pays more attention to the cheerleaders and football players. She wouldn't be the first teacher to play favorites and she won't be the last. You have a few choices here. One is to talk with the teacher - in private and not during class time. Stick with the facts. Talk about how your group is being yelled for what others are doing. If you do this, be specific about who, what, when and where. Let her know how this makes you feel. Is it interfereing with your learning? Is it making you feel less important? Be clear.
Another choice is to talk with your guidance counselor about this. Same directions...stick to the facts and how it makes you feel.
And of course you can wait for the end of the school year, which is coming closer everyday. You can chalk it up to a learning experience and plan for a better experience next year.
But there are two things I'm noticing here. First, how does this make you feel? Many kids would find this annoying but not get too bent out of shape over it. Some would have really hurt feelings. Some might even find it funny. Before you decide what to do, figure out how you're really feeling about this situation.
Second, the way you signed your letter was very interesting. Are you really "The kid The Teachers Hate?" "Teachers" means there is more than one teacher you have a problem with.
It's possible to have a real conflict with one teacher where it's just a personality issue. But if you think the teachers really hate you, it's a good idea to look at your own behavior. What are YOU doing that makes teachers upset with you? Figure that one out before you go forward.
Good Luck,
The Guidance Guy
P.S. Teachers almost never hate kids, even the ones they get annoyed with.
